>I am still not feeling festive – at all – but I am at least feeling more upbeat. While I may not feel full of holiday cheer, at least it’s a step in the right direction. We have two holiday parties to attend – tonight and tomorrow – so at least I get to get dressed up and leave the house! I’ve always liked parties, but now that I am working from home, just having somewhere to go is exciting! 🙂

AF is going to arrive any day…I did have brief delirious visions of being able to tell my parents that I’m pregnant when they’re here after Christmas, but I truly question how I can even think these things. I am not spotting (which lately, is a HUGE plus) or cramping, which starts to get my hopes up, but I know that in reality, I either ovulated later than I think (entirely possible), or I am just not having whatever problem led to spotting and cramping in the past. I am happy that I didn’t have any bleeding or spotting around ovulation this month, which seems to be happening on an every other month or so basis. I know I should probably see an ob/gyn for a yearly exam and mention it, but I am dreading it like you wouldn’t believe. I just don’t want to get into the discussion of being 36 years old, ttc for two years, and doing nothing about it. Plus, my insurance is a bit wacky from living in one state and working in another, so I may wait until that at least is straightened out (which I suppose would be when I have a new job, and I don’t know when that will be – hopefully soon).

One thing I am debating is prenatal vitamins. I still take them (although I forgot for a while when we first moved), and while it seems unnecessary, I don’t want to risk anything on the off chance that I do one day get pregnant. Especially at my age – folic acid is important. I read a few things yesterday that it isn’t good to take prenatal vitamins when you aren’t ttc or pregnant (but what if you’ll be ttc indefinitely??? they didn’t address that), so I’m torn. I found a multivitamin that has the recommended amount of folic acid, but it isn’t a prenatal. I thought about trying that, but I wonder what other people who have been ttc for long periods of time do about prenatal vitamins? Obviously, ttc for a long time and going through treatment is one thing – I’m talking about me – who is still sort of ttc but doesn’t expect anything to come of it…prenatals or no?