>This is probably an example of me over-thinking things, or me worrying about things before it's even necessary, but it has been on my mind.

When we moved in November, my boss let me keep my job and work from home. I had already applied for a few jobs before we came to this arrangement, and I've applied for a few more since then because I thought the situation was temporary. I had a job interview a while ago, and while I still haven't heard back from them, I felt like I should decide what I would do if I was offered the job.

Without getting into too many details, the job I interviewed for could be a great opportunity, but is also a lot of work. It would require some nights and weekends (regularly), and it would be a stressful job overall. It has the potential to also be really rewarding, but probably after at least a year of hard work. When I interviewed, I wasn't sure if I would accept the job or not, if they even offer it to me, and I've been weighing the pros and cons ever since. I got to a point where I thought I would take the job, but after the holidays, I had a change of heart.

I started thinking this week that I would be crazy to leave my current job. It's not the best job ever, but I get to work from home, and I get tons of vacation time. My boss is super flexible, and the main downside is that I have to travel for a few days every other month. It is by no means the job of my dreams, but it does have some benefits. I found myself hoping that I don't get the new job. I decided that if I was offered this other job, I would call my current boss and see what her plans are for me for the future. Would she let this situation continue until she retires in the fall? If she was willing to do that, I decided that I would turn down the potential new job.

Out of the blue, my current boss called me yesterday afternoon and said that she is planning to let me continue working from home until she retires in August/September (or maybe October). She said that she'd also recommend that her replacement let me continue doing this, too. Of course, I have no idea if the new person will go for it, but it's good to know she's recommending that this person keep me on.

I thought about it all night, and I finally decided to stay with my current job, and just cross my fingers that something will be available if/when I need it. I decided I would email the potential new employer and tell them I am no longer interested. It feels like the right choice, but there's a little voice in my head that is filled with doubt. What if it's the wrong decision? What if I can't get a job in the fall? I was going to contact the potential new employer and tell them I'm no longer interested, but I called my parents, and they essentially reinforced my doubts.

Despite my doubts, I feel good about it. Staying with my current job means that I can keep going to acupuncture, have tons of vacation time, and also keep the retirement money that my employer has contributed to my 401k (I'll be vested in July). A small part of my decision is linked to infertility and the hope that I get pregnant this year. If I keep my current job, I can focus on my health, acupuncture, etc, for the next 6-8 months. If I'm not pregnant after two more months of acupuncture, I might go see that doctor my acupuncturist recommended, and we all know how that goes. If he's going to find out what's wrong, I'll have to get (most likely) a bunch of tests, and probably not all on the same day. My current job would let me do that stress-free. The new job would be a lot trickier.

Aside from those reasons, it just feels right, but I've always chosen jobs because of what they will lead to, and not because of how I feel about them in the moment, day to day. I mentioned yesterday that I feel like I'm being propelled down a path, and this is part of it. Things seem to just keep falling into place, in a way, and I feel like sticking with my current job is part of it. It's just hard to turn that little voice off that tells me its the wrong choice.